Swan Oyster Depot

            “If I died eating at Swan’s counter, I’d die a happy man.” Anthony Bourdain has professed his adoration and glee for the magical ways the men and women at Swan Oyster Depot prepare and serve the highest quality of seafood.

Sitting down at one of the 20 bar seats available in the entire establishment I was instantly greeted with conversation from a fellow eater, moments later my Anchor steam arrived. As my lips hit the glass they were met with the texture of salt, yet no salt taste. The glass was crisp with ice on the brim, and the sweet nectar that San Francisco has been brewing since 1896 went down the gullet in a waterfall of refreshment. My server, a late 50-60-year-old man with chest hair flooding out of his shirt, looks at me with a smile and asks what I’d like. Going with one of the staples at Swan Oyster I ordered the crab-back. Served with a dense loaf of bread, you dip the bread in the magical mixture of crab fat, eggs, and meat that are in the body of the crab. Each glob is a dip into the bottom of the ocean. The fresh crustacean taste is evident as you get your first mouthful. The flavors exponentially increase as you find yourself scraping the hollowed-out shell of the crab that was just moving. It’s simple, use your hands and spoon the crab combination with your bread and stuff your face. You’ll wish you had another by the end of the experience.

Each course I ordered had brief intermissions where I would drink my beverage, which glowed a bright amber as the sun struck my glass through the window, and talked to the people to the right and/or the left of me. The second dish was an amazing combination seafood cocktail with a plethora of seafood. Succulent crab, titanic prawn, tiny shrimp swimming in cocktail sauce, and a couple enormous oysters to top of this mound of the ocean’s bounty. I took note my beer was almost finished at this point, I look down to take a bite, look up and it is truly a beautiful sight, a glass filled to the brim of some good ole Anchor steam. This is an exemplary example of the unspoken bond between server and customer in which can only be witnessed at places with great service and attitude. After an intense search and devour mission for the tiny shrimp swimming in the cocktail sauce, my satisfaction meter is steadily increasing. To break the meter, I ordered a dozen freshly chucked oysters. As the tray arrived my taste bud companion a.k.a. my server explained the three types of oysters my stomach will soon make acquaintance with. Miyagi, Kumamoto, and Blue Point oysters ranging from Seattle to Humboldt Bay. I reached for the oyster from Humboldt, and was immediately met with a warning from one of the fellow diners. He said, “Look out for the oysters from Humboldt, they’re very potent.” To be quite honest I was worried and confused, but he explained his joke about the oyster’s home being in the infamous Emerald Triangle. Grab a lemon wedge from the counter, squeeze some on top, a little horseradish, and a dab of Tabasco and it’s down the hatch. Each oyster had their own characteristic. The Miyagis, small, sweet and succulent. The Kumamoto was meaty, briny, and had a lot of body. Finally, the Blue Point oysters tasted of a balance of sweet and salty, with an aftertaste of bliss.

Swan Oyster Depot has been in San Francisco since 1946, and have been doing the same thing since then. No bullshit, no thrills (unless you are a seafood fanatic), just good seafood, with quality service. Due to the nature of the OGness of the restaurant there is no website, no reservations either. It is first come, first serve, and on busier days you may find yourself in line. So bring some cash (IT’S CASH ONLY), kick it in line with your homies, grab a couple (or more) Anchor steams, and stuff your face with seafood until you cannot stuff your face with seafood. This establishment does everything a restaurant should be, a place where the staff cares for the customer’s well-being, and they supply a space where people of all walks of life can sit down and break bread (or crab shells) with each other and converse.